Dearest Double Chin,
I know we've had a long run with eachother. You were kinda cute when I was a baby... less cute the older I got... and now you're just not cute at all. I hate how I look when I take a profile picture of myself, and thankfully myspace taught me how to angle from the top down to minimize your evil effects on camera. But guess what?! You're not so double anymore!! If you look at yourself in the mirror as critically as I look at every part of this body- or refer to the level-shot photo I attached... You're going away. Also notice that awkward look of peace on my face? I don't have to try so hard to "smile" to feel good about me. It just kind of happens these days. I wanted to wish you the best, because eventually you'll just be a distant memory in photos and scrapbooks.